Have you ever gotten to know someone who made you literally question everything about yourself as a person? I have, in my short twenty-seven years of life, met TWO such people in a very short span of time; and I don’t know what to do with myself anymore.
Who am I?
I would consider myself a very passionate, compassionate, sarcastic, outspoken, twenty-something college student, who loves animals with every fiber of her being.
Most of my close friends would probably agree with that assessment of me as a person in general
However, my romantic relationships of late have shown me another side, and one that I’m completely unsure of.
Relationships aren’t my strong suit to be honest. I’m a commitment phobe, I feel boxed in, insecure, pressured and they’re generally something I’d prefer to avoid all together.
(Save for the right person of course! Love you sweetie! Whoever you are!)
But at the same time I want one so bad!
So I find myself in situationships, that really leave us all scratching our heads – for one thing, where I’m finding these people, how are they so bad for me, (yet for some reason like me SO much) and why I have such a hard time disentangling myself from their clutches?
I have come to the conclusion, these events are placed in my life to teach me a few lessons.
1.) Don’t date in East TN
2.) Don’t date outside of East TN
3.) DON’T DATE ANYONE PERIOD
haha jk kidding 🙂
And also, this is who you are in a relationship situation Erin. IMPROVE YOURSELF.
This past year has been very, enlightening – and while I’m sorry for those I had to learn from, I’m also thankful that you gave me the opportunity to learn these things.
Such as, learning how to express myself clearly, learning how to give compliments, learning which personalities I get along better with in a romantic situation.
I’ve also learned loneliness is the wrong reason to enter into any sort of ‘thing’ with another person. I knew this, don’t get me wrong, but I didn’t KNOW this. But it took actually going through this, realizing I was solely hanging out with someone simply because I was avoiding being alone was sobering and unfair to them.
Sure I don’t know if a husband, white picket fence and two.five dogs are in my near future, but I’m damn sure going to ready when he arrives.
(probably won’t, but the intentions are there amirite?)